Here’s a scary thought: You can have a good youth ministry that never makes a single disciple.  All that a “good” youth program requires is energetic programs, lots of kids who are friends with one another, and some cool events.  Of course success here would be defined by things like attendance or how much kids enjoy the program.  One of my fears in leading our ministry to students is that we might work too hard to have a good program rather than working to make disciples.  Here are a few  dangers inherent in student ministry that can force our focus off of disciple-making.

1. We want students to want to be there.  Nothing wrong with this, but it gets a little confusing when we tell the congregation that church is not about them and the student ministry seems to be saying the opposite.  It is so tempting to cater to what kids want so that they will participate in your ministry.  I had a student tell me that he was going to go to a new church because they had a Wii and an Xbox 360.  Truthfully, my first thought was to figure out a way to get a PS3.  My second thought was how sad it was that this student bought into the idea that the church is designed to help him have a super fun time.  I want students to like being here, but I want them to like it because they recognize that it is making a difference in their faith and their lives.
2. We have really cool ideas.  I’m an idea guy, but sometimes I have to realize that while my ideas could make my ministry look newsworthy or unique, the ideas actually do nothing to build up our students.  It’s hard to pass up flashy curriculum or a cool event, but the focus needs to be on what will build our students up.  Truthfully, sometimes it is just  an easier sell to get kids to a movie rather than a food bank.  When I consider the events or plans that I come away feeling the best about, they almost always are those that focused the most on discipleship.  Some of my most encouraging times in ministry have been sitting around discussing the Bible rather than playing laser tag (though, I do love some laser tag).
3. We must feed the machine.  Our student ministry is pretty complex.  We have worship, small groups, retreats, camp, mission projects, Bible study, and a church volunteering program.  It takes a lot to make this work.  Unfortunately, there are times that we are so focused on keeping the programs going, that we lose sight of the people who come to the programs.  When I was a new minister, I would often be running around crazy trying to make sure things were all set for a Wednesday night or an event.  Rather than greeting students or sitting and eating with them, I was busy getting things loaded or printed.  It’s a painful experience to realize that your main concern was the program rather than the people.  Making disciples is a relational activity, and our programs need to reflect that reality rather than take away from it.
4. We think that a student’s attendance reflects his or her spirituality.  Bad news, a student can come to every program you offer and never grow one bit in their faith.  We probably think this about the adults in the church, but do we also realize it could be true about student ministry as well?  Books such as Almost Christian and Soul Searching have demonstrated that many very active students in our churches have very little ownership of the faith they claim to be living out.  Discipleship is not a passive activity but an active one.  The only way to gauge how our students are growing is to have conversations.  We are finding it more a more important to do check ups to see just where our students are in terms of maturing in their faith.

Warning: Young person rant has been detected below. 

It’s official.  I have now become one of those people who thinks the churchy ways we do things is just dumb.  I know that this makes me one of those young people who thinks all old things are stupid only to one day have young people think my things are stupid.  I know that there are reasons that our methodology came into being.  I know that it seems to work for so many churches.  Unfortunately, I still feel this way.  I am so sick of doing church the way that we have always done it.

Recently I listened to a conversation from the Church at Brook Hills regarding the discipling of the next generation.  They pointed out that today’s Church presently has the best curriculum, the best facilities, some of the biggest personalities, and even the most informed research that we have ever had when it comes to youth ministry, BUT we are seeing so many fewer teens becoming Christians and living out their faith.  What is the problem?  Did we get so caught up in improving our programs and youth rooms that we forgot what we were actually trying to do?  Did we think that a better logo would save souls?  Did we put our faith into our curriculum to the point that we forgot what that curriculum was supposed to do?  Did we decide that it was actually justified to spend 25 hours a week preparing our 30 minute Wednesday night talk that only a couple of kids would take to heart anyway?

I must confess that I am guilty of much of this, but I can no longer buy the lie that simply having a better set of events and weekly programs will grow our students’ faith and/or bring them to Christ.  Maybe this is one of those pivotal developmental moments that youth ministers are supposed to have.  Maybe what I am discovering is that my focus has been incredibly misappropriated.  What I am discovering is that making disciples is both much simpler and much more complex.  It is simpler because we don’t have to find the next gimmick or graphic.  It is more complex because now it means we have to significantly increase our engagement in the lives of the students.

I have about 25 students who are a part of my student ministry who I only see a couple times a month.  Some of these I only see on Sunday mornings if I look around in the worship center.  Despite dozens of invitations, these students have chosen not to commit to attending our programs or events.  I ask myself how much have I committed to them.  Why is it that I am defining commitment to attendance at a program?  Why is it that, outside of inviting them to events and weekly programs, I have very little to offer them in terms of discipleship?  This has led to a new set of questions.  How can I help in their discipleship process when they are with their parents or at home?  Is there a way to connect them to the church without forcing them to make a choice between their job or their sports and church?  Am I demonstrating through my approach that the only way to be discipled is to come on Wednesday and Sunday nights?

These are big questions, and I want to have answers.  What this does not mean is that I will now cancel all of my programs and events.  What is does mean is that I need to start looking at the programs as small parts of a bigger picture of discipleship.  This means putting the larger goal of making disciples in front at all times.  It means that I cannot do all of this by myself.  I can singlehandedly run a program, even a student ministry.  I cannot make disciples.  I need to start making disciplers.

I have been to enough leadership conferences to know that the pastor is supposed to constantly promote the vision of the church.  This helps remind everyone why the church exists and what it wants to accomplish.  Recently I have been thinking about how this should translate for our student ministry.  I began to realize how important it would be to remind the students why we exist as a student ministry.  If you work with students for about 30 seconds, you know that reminders are always necessary.  I often get text messages asking what time a weekly program starts by students who have been to the program each week for the last five months.  They just happened to have forgotten the times.  So, reminding students what we value and what we are trying to accomplish surely needs to be restated often.

Last night we had a vision casting time where we discussed where we have been as a student ministry and where we were going the rest of this year.  I took time to give some clear direction for what the students are expected to do and what they can expect from the ministry.  Truthfully this blew some of the kids’ minds.  We have many students who never considered that they were a part of something like this.  They just knew that they showed up when their parents sent them and hung out for a while.  They had no idea that this was supposed to do something for them.

I also took some time to hear from our students.  I like to know what they like best about the student ministry.  I don’t like to hear it, but I need to know what they don’t like about the student ministry.  I also wanted to know if they could articulate something that they have learned through participating in the student ministry.  I received some great responses that will help shape our ministry going into the fall semester.

Here’s the only problem with talking about why your student ministry exists: You need to know the answer first.  If you don’t have something to be working towards, then maybe kids do just show up and maybe you do too.  Spend some time seriously thinking about what you are trying to accomplish with the time and influence that God has given you with your students.  Spend some time asking whether your programs and approach are accomplishing these things.  When everything is aligned, tell your students, their parents, the volunteers, the random guy on the back pew.  Then continue to remind them of the vision so that you can accomplish that vision.

The fruit of our vision casting was obvious. The students left energized because they were a part of something bigger than themselves.  They left remembering that participating in the student ministry demanded life change not a status quo life.  The left challenged to make a difference and bring people into the community that we have established so that they might also experience life change.  One other thing that it did was to give me a foundation of expectations.  From now on I can reference that group time when I need to say things like “emotional drama is dumb and that is not what we are about here so work it out” or “so how is the lesson last week changing your life and helping you become more like Christ.”  Helping people know where we are and where we are going sure makes it a lot easier to get where we want to be going.

While reading a youth ministry article recently, I noticed a commenter asking why a student minister even needs an office.  As someone who has an office and spends time in that office each week, I had a hard time trying to figure out just what he or she was getting at.

I don’t necessarily love my time in my office, but I also cannot figure out how it is not necessary.  As the only paid youth staff at my church, I play a significant role in delivering programs and plans for our students.  I tried to figure out just what I do in the office and here is a list I came up with:

• Develop the program parts for Sunday and Wednesday night programs.
• Communicate with students, parents, and volunteers through facebook, email, blogging, and (the dreaded) phone call.
• Complete paperwork such as check requests and collection logs.
• Meet with volunteers, parents, and students about who knows what until they show up and ask if I have a second.
• Prepare and plan events such as retreats and mission trips.
• Spend time staying in touch with resources, articles, and youth ministry ideas.

This list leaves off a few things I am sure, but the thing is that I find myself in the office quite a bit.  There are some ministers who are on big staffs with their role only being to spend time with students.  There are also ministries where some of what I mentioned is done by volunteers (we’re working on that and will be in 20 years).  I simply find the office time to be a necessary part of my job.

Does this mean that it is what I would rather be doing?  Not really, though I do love to create a good plan and see it work.  I would much rather spend everyday mentoring students and helping them realize what God has in store for their lives.  However, something that I have to remember is that contributing the kingdom is done in many different ways.  Creating a calendar and planning a Wednesday night program can be important ways to contribute to what God is doing in the lives of your students. 

When we look at ministry as a journey, we see that sometimes you have to plan the trip before you can take the trip.  There are days like today when there just is not much going on, and I need to use the time to plan events and programs.  There are also days when I spend the majority of the day speaking to and working with students.  Some days we have impact through preparation and check requests.

I must admit that there are days when I have been in the office far too much, and at the end of the day I really wonder what I actually accomplished.  I have found that I need to do one thing that would count towards active discipleship in order for me to really feel good about my day.  Maybe it is a quick thank you note for a volunteer or a conversation over facebook with a student.  What pushes me and motivates me is that I never want to leave the office feeling like nothing would be different if I had just stayed home.

I love having conversations with the volunteers in our student ministry.  I like hearing about how they are learning along with the students and feeling like they are really making a difference.  Recently, though, I had a conversation with a volunteer that went in a different direction.  We began to discuss how easy it is for a minister or ministry volunteer to lose credibility and influence through just one bad decision.

The truth is that it doesn’t take much for our ministry to be derailed on account of our actions.  Ministers and ministry volunteers are definitely held to a higher standard than your average Christian and probably with good cause.  Ministry influence can be lost through one inappropriate conversation or one poorly thought out facebook post.

We have to actively maintain our integrity at all times, not just for the health of our own souls, but also for the souls of the people we minister to.  I have caught myself several times trying to decide if a facebook post would be perceived as appropriate.  I have had to change subjects when students ask particularly probing questions about movies I have seen or music I listen to.  One of the major elements of our jobs is to be an example to those we minister to.

I hear a lot of stories of youth ministers who are in trouble all of the time because they lacked discernment in certain areas of their lives.  This is frustrating because youth workers need to have people’s confidence in order for them to maximize their impact.  When we do something that takes away from our good example, we lose the trust of our constituents including the church staff, parents, and students wise enough to be disappointed.

As youth workers we want to be positive examples, mentors, and role models.  And with that comes a huge responsibility.  This does not mean that we cannot ever make a mistake, but it does mean that we need to enhance our discernment so as to minimize the mistakes we make that harm the ministry.